New Things
by Lara Ashleigh Lords
Summary: SG-1 try out new things.


Humor. Teal'c is introduced to alcohol and forms a rocky relationship   
with it. Samantha carter has to eat the stargate. Jack is locked in a   
room with henry the red coffee cup. Must include the line: "Nice rubber ducy, Niiice ducky..."   
**New Things**   
"Here Teal'c," said Jack O'Neill waving Henry (Daniel's red coffee cup) closer and closer to Teal'c. "Go on, Teal'c. Have a sip."   
Teal'c took hold of the red cup. He could smell the subtance in it as it was very strong.He took a glance at Jack. What could be so great about this Jack Daniel's that O'Neill was trying to make him drink it?   
"You have to Teal'c," butted in Smantha Carter. "Everybody has to do something new today. Today you have to drink 236 cups of Jack Daniel's"   
Teal'c looked around for an escape in his own little way. The Stargate was just behind him so he could always leave. However, as the whole team seemed so keen about this, Teal'c lifted the cup to his mounth. The smell really was very strong. He took a sip. Swigging it around in his mouth a bit, he decided the taste was very unique. "I like this drink," said Teal'c.   
"That's good," said Jack O'Neill, bottle already in hand. "You have to drink another 235 cups now."   
21 CUPS OF JACK DANIEL'S LATER   
Teal'c seemed to being enjoying himself walking around the room and bumping into things., Junior had failed him and he was drunk. Well, he wasn't sobber to say the least! It was Daniel's turn to chosse something new for Jack to do. He thought about it for a while. Then, it clicked.   
"Jack," he said. "You've never got along very well with Henry, have you?"   
Jack shoke his head. He thought that Daniel should have worked that out by now! However, this is DANIEL we are talking about here.   
"Well, you have to stay in the same room as Henry for the next half an hour!" yelled Daniel, pointing at Jack. Teal'c pointed too then he jumped around in circles. Carter just looked on, helplessly.   
Jack tried to stutter a reply yet nothing came to him. What could he say? Within seconds, Daniel had locked both Jack and Henry up in a small room. There was no escape. Jack looked at Henry. It was going to be a very very long time.   
5 CUPS OF JACK DANIEL'S LATER.   
"Daniel," started Carter, as Teal'c fell over a chair. "I know you have a phobia of rubber duckys"   
"Do I ever!" said Daniel, nodding his head. Teal'c also nodded his head and then he ran around the room on all fours.   
"Well," said Carter, reaching for something in her bag. "Here's my new thing for you. You have to hold this rubber ducky for 30 seconds."   
Daniel carefully took the rubber ducky from Carter. It's scary black eyes starred up at him. "Nice rubber ducky, Niiice ducky..."   
"Only another 21 seconds to go now Daniel," said Carter, trying to encourage him.   
O'Neill had obviously overheard this and yelled from his room "How much longer for me? I think I'm very close to the wrong side of sanity!" Nobody cared. Teal'c began to pour himself out another Jack Daniel's.   
"Come one, Daniel," said Carter. "Just another 7 seconds to go....."   
"Ahhh-booo-glle-jolll!!!!!" yelled Teal'c from behind a chair before running into a table. Daniel and Sam jumped. This made Daniel drop the rubber ducky.   
"Going to have start all over again, Daniel," said Carter as Daniel's face went white.   
29 CUPS OF JACK DANIEL'S LATER.   
After Daniel and Teal'c had had a fight over the Jack Daniel's, it was fianlly Carter's turn to do a new thing. Jack O'Neill had come out of the room and was very shakey. He was certainly on the wrong side of sanity.   
"I remember...." said O'Neill in a daze. "I remember....red." Dr. Frasier came immediatly with some other guys. By the way, these other guys had white coats on.   
"Well, Teal'c," stated Daniel. Teal'c looked up, tougne hanging out of mouth. "You have to pick something for Carter to do."   
Teal'c thought for a while. Or at least, he knew he was thinking for a while. To Daniel and Sam it looked more like he was trying to impressinate a chicken. "I think Carter should eat the Stargate." said Teal'c.   
Carter gasped. She was just about to protest against it when she saw the look on Daniel's face. Oh well. She did make him hold that rubber ducky. Carter sighed and made her way towards the gateroom.   
When she was inside the gateroom, Sam slowly made her way towards the Stargate. She could she Daniel watching her from the door way. Teal'c wasn't there. Sam guessed he was probley too busy tripping over the table to come. Carter sat down besaide the Stargate. Slowly, she took a bite out of in and began to chew. It was a very long time before anything else seemed to happen. Daniel edged forwards as if expecting something. "It kind of tastes like starwberries, Daniel. It tastes nice." said Carter as she began to eat some more.   
45 CUPS OF JACK DANIEL'S LATER.   
General Hammond entered the gateroom to see what SG-1 were doing. Along side him stood O'Neill.   
"Wow!" said O'Neill just before entering the gateroom. "This place is so not red." General Hamond gave O'Neill a comforting smile before rolling his eyes.   
As General Hammond opened the door to the gateroom, what a shock was before him. Daniel Jackson was underneath a table with a rubber duck on. He looked kind of scared. Teal'c was running around the room looking like a headless chicken. He also had a saucepan on his head. The Stargate was gone. Carter was the only one who look slightly normal. "Carter!" yelled Hammond. "What is going on?"   
"Oh, don't worry sir. Everything's under control. I take it you already know what happened to O'Neill. Daniel's afraid of that rubber duck over there. Teal'c's drunk. And, oh yes, I just ate the Stargate. We should defernatly get one of those for the next dinner party we have. It tastes kinda like strawberries........." 


End file.
